Silent treatment is a tactic that all types of manipulators use, specially Narcissists.
I have been through months and years of silent treatment. It felt like I am trying to talk to a wall, but practice makes perfect. I got silent treatment so many times I became silent treatment proof and I think this is something that everyone should learn.
You need to train your mind from reacting to the silent treatment from the other person. For that, you need to master your self-talk. You have to remind yourself some simple points everytime it bothers you.
1. Remember your worth.
2. Someone not talking to you, avoiding, ignoring you, does not define your self-worth.
3. Prefer to be alone than being with people who make you feel alone.
4. Focus on yourself and being productive.
5. Engage with people who do give you true love and care. Shift your focus to what you have, from what you don’t have.
6. Remember it’s abuse and you can’t give in to the trap.
7. Don’t let anyone’s opinion of you affect your self-esteem. Remind yourself how much care you deserve in return of what you bring to the table and how much effort you put.
8. Reciprocation is key. Any relationship where your time and energy is not being reciprocated, is not right for you.
9. People who aren’t even willing to communicate with you, don’t deserve you. Stop giving yourself explanations on why they aren’t able to, actions speak louder than words.
Now when you are not bothered about it on the inside. You can decide to go no contact with anyone who tried to give you silent treatment just to prove their point and control you.
When you consciously decide to pull back your energy from wrong places and invest it into yourself, what happens on the outside also changes.
And Narcissists like to Hoover their victims. Hovering means they try to love-bomb you again and get you back with their charms, as soon as you start to seem moving away from their control. They act sweet, nice and show as if they have learnt their lesson and care for you, only till they are able to get your boundaries down. And the abuse starts again.
Focus on self-love and set boundaries. It’s time to give all that love to yourself.
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