You Deserve Everything

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This is a abundance block that most people have.

I have been a giver my whole life and then even after awakening I was still feeling overwhelmed for what this universe has given me, the gifts, the lovely people, the blessings, the happiness and everything. I was burdening myself with a sense of keep doing something constantly so that I can pay back to this world. Which I am still going to do, I still have a sense of purpose because it makes me myself, but I have now realised everyone’s first purpose is to live life to the fullest.

Any God that you believe in, it answers your prayers, it gives you love, hope, happiness regardless. You just need to be you, your authentic self and you don’t have to pay back to him for what you have received. You got it because you already deserve it.

It took me years to realise that I deserve respect, I deserve love, I deserve to be me, I deserved to be happy, I deserve to have right people and relationships in my life, I deserve success, I deserve appreciation, I deserve everything. And then it took a moment of spiritual realisation to know that whatever I deserve, I deserve it by just being me, I don’t have to have a sense burden to pay back to the world.

So every human being, deserves everything. Love to be the most. Everyone deserves it. Stop feeling unloved, non-deserving, un-lovable, people who love you, they love for who you are. Stop trying to make people stay in your life by keep giving, those who love you will anyway stay. You are enough, just by being yourself.

You are life, a being of love and you deserve love.
Be open to receiving love.

P.S. This quote doesn’t mean you try to get everything by manipulating, controlling or abusing others in a Narcissistic way.

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Be Free From External Influence

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Everyday that I am building a new life for myself, breaking the norms, reaching self-fulfillment, I meet people who don’t believe in me. But guess what, I don’t care anymore. Because I know how stepping into my power makes me feel like.

People who don’t have faith, teach you to not have faith.
People who don’t feel confident, teach you to not be confident.
People who aren’t true to themselves, don’t want you to be truthful.
People who can’t shine on their own, don’t want you to shine.
People who don’t know how to trust, teach you to not trust.
People who are insecure inside, try to make you feel insecure.
People who don’t know how to Love, teach you not to love.
People who don’t have a pure heart, teach you to not have one.
People who are not kind, teach you to not be kind.
People who don’t have a life, don’t want you to have one.
People who feel powerless, teach you not to feel in your power.
People who don’t know how to take a stand, teach you to not have a stand.

People do it because they don’t know any better. But I am a way shower and if I get stuck, then who’s gonna do it. So I’m gonna do it anyway. My life’s purpose for this lifetime is to live my authentic self and I will do it no matter what.

People feel I am soft so they can throw their shit stuff on me, but they make one mistake when they forget that I am a mixture of all things including inner power. I don’t step down to any of my haters’ level, I just do me.

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I See You

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I see Dr you
I see you all, I see all of it
I see you
I see what you are inside
I see you
I see you are not what you say
I see you
I see how insecure you are
I see you
I see how fearful you are
I see you
I see that you can’t see the good in me
I see you
I see the pain that you are in
I see you
I see the disgust you do to hide it
I see you
I see your inner demons coming for me
I see you
I see your shame and insecurities that you try to throw upon me
I see you
I see the pain that you want me to be in
I see you
I see the pain that you want to run away from
I see you
I see that you don’t know who you are
I see you
I see that what you do is a cry for love
I see you
I see the pain in this world
I see you
I see the need for love in this world
I see you
I see that someone has to stop hurting
I see you
I see that I need to end the pain
I see you
I see I can’t become a reflection of you
I see you
I see the need to find good in people
I see you
I see the need in this world for people like me
I see you
I see why you want to dim my light
I see you
I see why you hate me
I see you
I see that you are not able to love yourself
I see you
I see that I am here to share love
I see you
I see that I am here to spread light
I see you
I see that I am here to add hope
I see you
I see I am here to show the power of healing
I see you
I see that I was born for a purpose
I see you
I see that it’s time when I become my true self
I see you
I see I need to show the way to the world by being myself.

Painting courtesy @olechkadesign

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Never seek validation from people about your own story

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This is a raw and straight forward write. I am so freaking tired of people telling me that I was never abused and it’s all just in my head.

Really!! Did I do all the healing work and forgive all my abusers and turned my pain into creativity so this pain doesn’t go outward into the world, only to hear that nothing ever happened.

Every time I tried to speak up and seek help that I am being bullied, mobbed, abused, used, misused. I was told that I am overthinking, I have a complex, I have a victim mentality, I am a difficult, negative, toxic person, its a conflict and everyone’s favourite “I am too sensitive”. It was a lot of times the authority which did so. It’s not called authority, it’s called false authority where people try to use their power for their benefit and to suppress others. But no, not anymore. Because I left everything behind, everything that could overpower me to suppress my voice.

People come and ask me what happened to me, what all I faced, I open up and in return I don’t get even a single sentence of empathy but all the shit that it was my fault. No it was not. I didn’t deserve to be treated like that, no matter what. No human deserves to be treated like that.

People, sorry not people, abusers, they abuse you but don’t want to take self responsibility. Because they will have to agree to feel the shame if they did, the same shame that they were running from and abusing others.

I am not giving anyone power to come and tell me that it never happened or I asked for it or I deserved it or it’s because something’s wrong with me. Because it’s not the truth. I’ve never asked for approval or validation from anyone on if I was actually abused or not. Abuse is done to make you feel like you are the problem, when actually it’s the other person. Why should I accept it, to be treated like trash and to take someone else’s garbage as mine.

Everyone of us, who has been abused sometime in our life by someone we probably loved and cared for. We need to look them in the eye and tell them that this happened to me and I didn’t deserve it. You need to fix your shit and if you can’t, then atleast don’t expect me to take it anymore.

This post may not get that many likes, but may be it will turn some people towards self-reflection. May be some people will realise what our so called system can do to a person and why it needs to be changed.

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Who am I?

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I have been working on myself very hard for 3 years now and I feel it’s time to open up. I have been writing in a lot of posts that I know who I am. It’s going to be a big post but starting is more important.

I am an EMPATH. Empath is a personality type, it’s not a psychological problem, it’s actually how a person’s body and mind is structured to the level of DNA and neurons. We have heightened level of empathy, we can feel other people’s emotions in our body as of our own. Feeling other’s energies introduces sensitivity to sound, big crowdy places, heat, negative people, any kind of violence and toxic environments. It also comes with a gift of creativity and capability to heal myself and others.

I am not an exception, I know and have connected with so many creative people and youtubers who are also are also empaths. I here most of them saying that it’s just that an empath is different, but I see it as being extra ordinary (because I feel it’s time to introduce the Highly sensitives in this world as powerful and not weak). All empaths are very kind, never want to do anything wrong. Empaths are kind, generous, giving, caring but sometimes they do it at the cost of their own happiness.

Most of the empaths have strong intuition in childhood, growing up they learn to fit in the society and suppress their intuition and creativity as well. Sometimes we grow up feeling odd one out and with self-doubt of being crazy. Because we don’t know that the emotions that we feel are other people’s. Feeling anger, criticism, anxiety of everyone around is messy.

It’s very important for Empaths to be aware of what they are. Otherwise they spend most of their life in a limbo, in nihilism. We attract abusers, bullies and energy vampires because we are able to generate our own energy and we have a light because of our goodness. Our light is what attracts more abuse, being sensitive increases the affect of abuse on an empath than on any other type of person.

I have been working on myself and learnt a lot of things about myself. When empath are educated they are more powerful, strong and abuse-free. I have started becoming an empowered empath and rather than being scared of other people’s energies, now I enjoy being me.

Self love is the only thing which saves every empath from a lot of things. It makes us empowered and in control of our emotions. Not only I practice self-love, but it has also become my essence now.

I don’t see being sensitive as a flaw, it makes me different. I feel sensitive to nature, animals, children and people in need and want to help them. Which I don’t thing is a negative quality. My sensitivity brings me so many blessings.

I was waiting for the right time to share this with people, because I needed to be in an empowered state before sharing it. I know there is a chance of people reacting negatively to this. But now I am ready to deal with it.

I have also been going through an spiritual awakening since the time a completely accepted that I am an empath. First it was like an emotional awakening, when I remembered my deep self that I have been hiding. I learnt to love myself, to admire my own uniqueness, to appreciate myself for coming out strong through so many things. Then suddenly all my unconscious fears started coming up, I learnt that it is the “dark knight of the soul” phase that I am going through. Where all my qualities that were suppressed and all the fears that were introduced to me by my surroundings/society. After working on most of them and the big fears, I started blossoming and being happy. It was a feeling of bliss which I had never experienced.

Next I found myself changing psychologically, creatively and in every aspect of my life. Now I just be myself and get in flow with life. It’s like I am blossoming, and sometimes it gets scary because it’s new to me. But it’s still an expansion for me. I am becoming what I was meant to be and I am happy about it.

I am still a work in progress and still do get more realisations every now and then. I still have a lot to explore about myself and life. Sharing my journey with the world is also a part of loving myself unconditionally and fearlessly.

Thanks for bearing through this long post.

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Forgiveness

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To live lighter, learn to forgive. It frees you more than the other person. People act according to their conditioning and a lot of times it’s about them not you.

Don’t label people as bad but only their karma, their actions. Because the reason why a person is like that, is also because of society. ( The collective karma or consciousness).

I don’t want to sound philosophical here. But I have experienced it too many times that when I forgive someone completely for what they did. First it saves me from living in resentment. Next what happens is the people who were there for a season move away automatically (because now the karma is over) and those who are there for a lifetime, we are able to start fresh in the relationship or friendship. Sometimes people just turn into acquaintance from being your closed one, but at least the friction goes away.

This is the work of forgiveness. And there is one more aspect to forgiveness that is. If someone did something really bad to you. You don’t necessarily have to go and still love them like they didn’t do anything to hurt you, but actually to have a closure. That I forgive you, no harsh feelings, but I’m done with you and we are over.

P.S. you thought my life is easy, it’s not. I had too many people to forgive to be free. I don’t want anyone to feel sorry for me, my story is good. Because whatever happened in my life has shaped me for good. I just want to bring out the fact that your problems can make you miserable or better. Choice is always yours.

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Learn From Your Obstacles

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Found the right words finally.. I know it hurts to be learning from your obstacles, when you are in the situation, all you can think is why me. Same happened with me, but when I look back, I can see so many lessons which I might have not learnt if I did not go through those obstacles. So did I learn the lessons that people were trying to teach me. Actually the ones that life was trying to teach me.

I learnt different things. From one I learnt to respect all genders (yes all genders, not only two), another took me back to start painting again, one showed me all my fears and hence I got a chance to work on each one of it. Some showed me the importance of life, importance of family, importance of friendship, meaning of death, to respect all ages, to respect women, to respect equality, to respect myself, to love myself, to be vocal, to travel, some taught me to respect the defined lower tribe, some taught me the meaning of trust, meaning of faith, meaning of hope, meaning of forgiveness, meaning of will power, meaning of love, of pain. Some took me closer to my understanding of my purpose of life. Most of it all, it all made me stronger everytime and my sadness taught me the importance of happiness.

Whatever life throws at you, can be utilized for your growth. It only depends on your attitude and mindset. Everything that life gives, can help you open your mind.
My intention here is not to brag about anything. But i feel grateful that I learnt so much so early in life and maybe I would be able to make a better life now. And i want to spread the message of hope that no matter what you are facing now, the sun will rise and you will shine one day. Don’t give up. Nothing has so much power over you.

Brahmakumaris say “what’s in the way, is the way”.

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You can choose to be A Victim, A Voice or An Inspiring Story

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Soften your heart..

It’s going to make your heart feel heavy. But everyone needs to realise this.

In the life of hustle, we harden our hearts so much that we forget the meaning of life, the meaning of love.

Everyone just wants to be on top, wants to put others down to make themselves better. Our society has been it’s own enemy while setting the norms of perfection, comparison and success. People don’t realise what they do to just satisfy their ego, can create endless pain for someone. There is a need to soften everyone’s heart, it’s not like it’s not in them. When you travel, spend alone time with nature, don’t you feel those quality of your loving soul. It’s in everyone but has been submerged by our lifestyles.

There is another type of people on the spectrum, those who have been through pain and understand the meaning of pain, not wanting to see anyone to go through same pain. This is the empathy which life teaches us, it tries everyday but only some learn. Is it that difficult to understand what it means to lose a loved one. Even after living through so much, some people choose to bring light in someone else’s life.

And those who suffer, don’t think of ending your life, get support, get counseling, choose to be heard. It doesn’t make you less, it shows you are more stronger than your problems. You can choose to be a victim, a voice or an inspiring story. Choose the right option.

People suicide when they experience pain on such level, that they feel it’s easier to end life than live in that void, that sadness and helplessness.

Everyone of you can choose to do your part to save more lives. You can do it by not demeaning others to make yourself better, learn to self-reflect and self descipline. You can do it by being a listening ear to someone who is finding themselves helpless with no shoulder to cry on. You can do it by spending time with your loved ones and being open to listening shame if they have something to talk about. You can do it by spreading awareness of how one’s behavior can be harmful to others.

And most importantly you can do it by learning to love yourself in every situation, when you love yourself, nor there is a need to suppress yourself, nor something can hurt you this badly, nor you have a need to suppress someone else, nor there is fear in reaching out for help, and you are always ready to teach others how to love themselves.

Kudos to those who chose to reach our for help and their families who stick through the pain with them.

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The Truth About KARMA

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Spirituality is not being understood well. Karma is not bigger than life.
People keep blaming their life situations saying that it’s their past life Karma. I agree, to something that you are not able to find an answer could be past life Karma. But people either forget or don’t want to understand the fact that present karma is more powerful than past karma. And life is powerful than both.

Once you become conscious, all the karma leaves behind, because it changes your psychological structure, your memory, you remember your true self with all the 7 qualities of soul in balance. Now you can properly conduct this life that’s in you. And this ultimately makes you escape the karmic trap itself.

Funny thing is people blame past karma, but don’t even realise what they are doing in present. It’s not always that you get your past life Karma back, most of the times it’s from your present life itself. Day to night all that negativity you spread, that negativity enters you first before entering anyone else and keeps you in a state of lower consciousness.

Theory of Karma itself says, karma doesn’t come back after few days, months or years. Whatever you do on to others, is already done to you, it already brought you in the lower vibration. To make such decisions of doing wrong Karma by will, it takes certain level of unconsciousness.

And some people be like we didn’t have a choice. Perhaps you did have a choice, but because the right path was tough, you chose the easy one. Not making a choice is also a choice. What choices you are ready to make, also depends on your will power/soul power.

When you make the right choices even in chaos, maybe you are in trouble because of past karma, but even while facing the situation, if you take right actions, this good karma will also come back. Isn’t it!!

I know I am dropping a bomb here, and a lot of people are going to be like what!! But just pay attention to what is being told in so many scriptures and by so many spiritual gurus, it’s all the same thing. I’m not talking about anything new.

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A break from life

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It’s summer here in Bangalore & I can remember my childhood days totally. If you are an Indian and 90’s kid, remember the fun, freedom and happiness, the summer vacation used to bring to each of us. We would wait for the summers to arrive whole year. We used to be free souls and happy from within for no big reasons.

These days when I look around, I struggle to find people who are happy like we used to be in childhood. I see people smiling, laughing, enjoying, partying. I see all kind of joyful people who are now adults but I don’t see that absolute happiness in anyone.

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