Category: spirituality

It’s always the victim who has the power to end the abuse

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Wondering why I think so?

The abuser is always a person who does not even know how to regulate his/her own emotions. They can not end the cycle of abuse, never. It always takes the victim to make a decision, once the victim decides, he/she can end the cycle. How?

If with a Narcissist, do not give them what they want. Don’t give them drama. If already past that stage, start showing them the mirror, the Narcissists, they fear coming face to face with their own reality.

(Showing a mirror to Narcissist or walking away, both are a form of compassion for them. Just do not engage in the drama and give them a chance of self-reflection. I know it never works, they never are able to self reflect so much, but maybe they start seeing the truth one by one, victim by victim for their whole life. And probably when they get old, they can recall what they did.)

If it’s not a Narcissist, only a toxic person, don’t engage. Don’t engage with them. They are people who are in so much pain inside, that they want to create the same reality outside. They become self-destructive.

If it’s a person who has some kind of power over you, legally. Walk away (Yes, it sounds like an escape, but read it till the end). Now you would say but then I want to prove myself, my worth, I want to take back everything that they have damaged, my image, recognition everything. But no, you do not engage. You trying to prove your worth keeps you in a cycle, that’s what they want. Instead, you acknowledge your worth on your own and leave. Move on to next phase of your life, prove yourself there and these people will get their lessons on their own.

Walking away is a power, it’s such a big power in itself. When you walk away, you show them the difference between you and them. That you are not willing to waste time on these stupid games. Always remember, walking away is power. It will save you from a lot of misery.

Take back your power, do not put your worth in their hands, do not define your worth by how they treat you. Do not wait for them to accept your worth and treat you right. You are worthy, on your own. You are an amazing fantabulous person, just as you are. Never forget your own worth.

And you never know, if you are strong enough to take this decision, maybe God will smile and give you a chance to prove yourself, just before you are about to leave. I got that chance & I love my decisions now.

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An educated empath is a Narcissist’s worst Nightmare

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Did you think empaths have to be scared of Narcissists? It can be the other way around, once the Empath learns their worth.

When empaths learn to love themselves, their self-worth, to discern between fear and intuition, to trust their intuition, to set boundaries and educate themselves over the same single pattern all the Narcissist use every time, they become empowered.

Start your journey today and in some months you will learn to set boundaries, that will itself save you from a lot of Narcs. Psychologists use the term “supply” for a Narcissist’s victims. A good supply is someone who helps the Narcissist inflate his/her ego, gives them validation that they need and lets them have control. If you know how to set boundaries, you will fail a Narcissist as a supply, in the starting few interactions.

Narcissists want to manipulate everyone to feed on their insecurities, so they observe the victim in starting stages of the relationship, that’s the love bombing stage. They will show themselves as the gratified immensely good person they are and how the world is always bad to them. An educated empath in turn, also observes the Narcissist in these starting stages.

If you learn to use your intuition right way and trust it, it will always protect you. I am an intuitive person too, my intuition always tries to tell me something whenever I need protection and I utilise my intuition.

If you educate yourself on Narcissism and your own behaviours that keep you stuck with Narcissists, you will soon learn to come out of the toxic cycle faster with less drama. All Narcissists are scared of being shown the mirror, of their false self-image being broken and educated empaths can do it. Show a Narcissist how inflated their ego is, and they are nowhere close to what they think of themselves.

Using boundaries, you learn to show a Narcissist that all the good qualities they see in themselves are yours, and all the insecurities that they try to project on you to harm your self-worth and keep you stuck in that fog, are all his/her insecurities.

The Narcissist then discards the supply and moves on to a new victim. If you don’t do this, they will anyways discard you after sucking you dry out of the love for yourself, when they have completely ruined you and stolen your identity, they leave, you are not useful to them anymore. They will leave you completely broken & shattered, when you are looking up to them, hoping that they will change. But they don’t change, they know you have sensed that they are not what they were pretending to be, so they leave. They give themselves excuse by saying that you are not as good, positive, energetic person now as they thought you were. Soon you will be out of sight – out of life for them like you never existed for them.

By having boundaries, you can instantly become Narc-repellent. Also, self-love is the only cure to Narcissistic abuse, one day you reach that level of self-love that your happiness comes first than the Narcissist’s, and you become an empowered empath.

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Sensitives are here to show this world a new way of living.

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People look at highly sensitives and empaths as weak. But they are not.

Some may believe that a sensitive person is triggered easily, but it is not the case. Most of the sensitive people trigger others. They show you your own shadow aspect and what needs to be healed. The same reason why Narcs are always after empaths.

Some look at it as, you need to be careful around a sensitive person about how to talk, how to behave, but it’s actually teaching you a right way of behaviour, it shows you your own patterns, coping mechanisms and reached you an emotionally healthy way of being and respecting boundaries.

Sensitives are not weak, it’s only them, who are so much in touch with their emotions. That they can do the work to heal themselves and others too. “They have what it takes”, to go inward, sit with the pain, observe all the emotions and work on them. They can transmute the energy that comes towards them and bring high vibrational energies into their environment. They have the strength to break the chain of negativity, pain and generation of Ancestral trauma.

Empathy is all that it takes to self-reflect, become self-aware, learn self-love and reach self-fulfilment. You are not awake if you don’t have empathy. A lot of great spiritual teachers define awakening by one quality that is humility. No matter how many spiritual practices you do, but if empathy and compassion are missing, you still have a lot to learn.

Most of the Lightworkers, starseeds, healers, earth Angels, highly spiritual people i.e. all high vibrational souls are highly sensitive. They are here to teach everyone a high vibrational way of connection and relationships.

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Why HEALING is Important?

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Healing means to clear all your past wounds and start fresh. Wounds of trauma, probably abuse, violence, shame etc.

It’s important because only after healing yourself you can reach your full potential, find true bliss and enjoy life everyday. You might say that you don’t have any trauma, you don’t have a bad past, but there can be many subconscious wounds that you are not aware of.

If you find yourself doing 5 minute rule for texting, pretending that you are busy, living for people’s approval, feeling over burdened by life, lashing out someone’s anger on someone else, using silent treatments, getting triggered by any online posts, triggered by interacting with people, there is something that requires healing. If you are conflict avoidant, having commitment issues, anger issues, all of it can be healed.

There are so many subconscious fears and societal programming in everyone’s mind that come to surface whenever anything drastic happens in their life. So do you want to wait till that moment when everything comes to surface altogether and bursts into anxiety or you want to go inwards and work on yourself now so that you are always ready to take a difficult situation and transform it into calmer waters.

Those who know that they faced some trauma, they know how it is to feel broken. And only healing can help you bring yourself together again. When you heal yourself, you won’t have to feel broken. I tried healing myself and it happened one day, one day I stopped feeling broken. It can happen for you too. If I can do it, you can do it too. I won’t ask you to have hope, but I can assure you that it works.

Healing can take you towards enlightenment, it introduces you to a high vibrational way of living.

If you liked this post, follow me for regular posts about healing. We will look at the spiritual perspective of healing, how it works and step to heal yourself.

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Poem – I choose

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I choose.

I choose to be a fighter,
I choose to be a protector,
I choose to be a defender,
I choose to be a nurturer.

I choose to fight the wrong,
I choose to be the voice for justice,
I choose to make the noise,
I choose to be the change,
I choose to be fearless,
I choose to be unstoppable.

I choose to be a rebel, a dreamer, a truth teller, a way shower.
But first, I choose to be a human.

Today is the day when I cannot control my anger anymore. I have seen every kind of pain. Sometimes the pain and anger creeps in and gets on my nerves. Sometimes I wonder why me , why I always had breakthroughs in all those struggles. Then I realise it’s a life of destiny and I choose to take the call to be the voice.

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Don’t sacrifice for people, they know what they are doing

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You think people are hurt and don’t know what they are doing.. They do know it somewhere deep inside, but they choose not to take responsibility for what they do. Just to hide from guilt, regret, shame or being responsible for something.

We take adjustment in relationships to next level, when we think they are not able to realise something. But actually we need to let them realise and do their inner work. You can not save somebody from this pain, by sacrificing on your side. The same pain leads them to grow into a better person.

There is always a limit on what can be forgiven and what can be adjusted. Hurt people, hurt people. It works when you want to forgive someone, but does not if you keep letting someone cross your boundaries.

Any sort of relationship works well only when both sides meet each other half way.

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Nature is like life-sauce for Empaths

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Life-sauce ☘️🍁🍀
It’s true for everyone, but Empaths. They get their boost from earth.

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You do not have to stay BROKEN

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And one day you will be whole and feel in complete in yourself.

This one is so close to my heart, nobody actually knows how much I have been through, a series of unlimited problems, that broke me to the core. But I never gave up and finally I am starting to feel whole again with myself. I am falling in love with myself again.

No matter how hard I try, I can not express this into words. I felt as if the whole world was against me and I questioned why nobody tried to help me, and they I broke into tears realising how many forces were with me trying to help me all this long, something brought so many breakthroughs for me. I cannot be grateful enough.

Remember, what you are going through today, will make you tough like a diamond tomorrow and you will shine. Never give up, never leave hope. Time will change, it may take years, but it will.

P.S. Sometimes all you need is a good cry.

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Re-evaluate your friendships everyday

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One of my oldest writes. 18 May 2018. Triggered quite a lot of people that time, though I didn’t realise then that they are fake.

How to recognise toxic friends? That friend who puts a status when you share your failure with them and gets competitive at your success. Who always talk about your not-so-good moments to others and rarely your qualities. People who always find something to blame you for or always make you feel invalidated. Who are probably never there for you, but you are always, no reciprocity. Friends who get jealous, compare your life with theirs, criticize you, discourage you when you talk about your dreams. Definitely wrong types of friends.

I filtered people in my life for quite a good amount of time, say 2 years and I know how healthy friendship feels like. Unhealthy friendship is one of those things that you don’t realise until you experience something better.

Why is it important to cut toxic people out of life? You become like the 5 closest people in your life, so you need to stay away from misery. If you are investing your time in the wrong people, you will have less time for the right people. The right people are those who will always work on themselves & all the issues, to meet you halfway in any kind of relationship. Friendship is an important one, because this is the only relation we get to choose completely by ourselves.

It takes a lot of courage to cut contacts with people, but once you are through the process, you will feel more loved, excited about life & end up thanking yourself for doing it, loving yourself more.

I literally started with feeling guilty of giving up on people, but now I am proud of my decisions. But what if I didn’t give up on them? What if I gave up on myself??
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So give yourself permission to become your truest authentic self. Your journey starts with choosing people who align with it.

Quote inspired by Joel Osteen.

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Learn to give yourself Permission

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Do you feel that people will not allow you to be your best version? It’s just a self limiting belief, a mental block and a subtle example of victim consciousness.

I have been through this too, I was scared if people will be able to accept me being my best version or not. Now I realise I was actually scared of myself, because I had never been the great person that I had the potential to become.

If you think people will not let you live your best life, probably you have too many toxic people in your life & you might need to start removing them from your life. Because they might want you to be stuck with them in misery when they see you growing. Learn to give yourself priority and set boundaries straight with them.

For the bigger picture, the whole world, everywhere on this planet earth, everything operates on two things – control & fear. If you are going to wait for people to give you permission to become free, fearless and authentic. That’s never going to happen for real, so it’s only you who can give yourself permission to be your best, no one else can. Learn to give yourself permission. Don’t wait for people to validate you, just do it.

People who love you truly, will appreciate the change. Most likely everyone is going to love you more than you expected. Toxic people will start seeing what God has ordained on your life & leave you alone. You will also get a chance to let go of what doesn’t serve you anymore, by looking at people who don’t like the change in you.

When you become your authentic self, every aspect of your life, all your relationships will transform for good.

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