Tag: oneness

Is it LOVE or ATTACHMENT?

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Till the day you give in to your fears or act according to your wounds, it’s attachment. The day you break free, it becomes love, because before that it’s all about ME, ME, ME.

It’s about yourself because you want the other person to adjust for you, you want the other person to wait for you till you complete your other priorities, you want society to understand your love before loving who you claim to love. Sometimes you don’t even want to confess your love because you are afraid of rejection, it will hurt your ego. You want the other person to understand, you want the other person to compromise, you want to be right, you want them to make you feel safe against your own insecurities, you want them to love you first, so that you won’t have to step up, so that you don’t have to fight your insecurities on your own. You don’t want to see them happy with anyone else you leave them alone anyway.

You want them to wait so that you can clear all other things in your life, before you give them back. You claim you want to bring balance, but for that also you want the other person to be patient and do your job. Where’s the balance now? You have all these high expectations of them, but what about their basic needs.

Till the day everything is about yourself, it’s attachment, it’s not love. Love does not give in to fears, love is not selfish. Love frees, love teaches love, but it also teaches to fight against everything else, all barriers, to keep that love by your side. Love does not want something in return, it surrenders.

When your love becomes unconditional, it becomes free, free of opinions, free of limitations, free of fears, free of everything else. Once everyone can see it’s unconditional, no opinion can interfere anyway. It becomes free, it surrenders. True love is surrender to the feeling of love and to the one you love.

So is it love? Ask yourself.

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May be someday, you will have to forgive yourself, for not forgiving others.

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Think.

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The most important factor for happy relationship is Boundaries.

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Some say it takes trust, some say respect, some say unconditional love.

But how would you know how much trust means trust and how much respect means respect for the other person. That’s where boundaries are important.

Unconditional love, people get an idea of selfless love, let the other person do whatever he/she wants, I will keep loving. Can this really work? Another person can exploit your boundaries and expect you to love unconditionally.

True love is when you learn that having boundaries is a part of unconditional love. Not having boundaries is like betraying yourself, not being true to yourself. Can you actually give true love, when you are coming from a place where you are not in 100% alignment with yourself. To be one with anything else, you need to be one with yourself first.

[oneness]Boundaries are the secret of happy relationships, both platonic & non-platonic. Through all these years, when my life was falling apart, the relationship that still sustained are the ones who know how to respect boundaries. Happy relationships are the secret to a happy life.

P.S. Learn the difference between oneness & boundaries. I learnt this from Teal swan.

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