It’s the fear of letting go for which we try to hold on to the ones we love, so tightly that we don’t realise it doesn’t feel like love anymore.
We often try to change ourselves and control the other person to manipulate situations, because we fear what if everything ends.
But we don’t realise love doesn’t bind, it liberates. It let’s you go.
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Everyone knows how much I have been through but I am finally learning to completely forgive people who did wrong to me. Except those who don’t respect women and I have still not found a reason to forgive harassers. It’s a crime and it will be.
I walked away from all of you. Some of you are still the same, some of you learnt the lesson and changed, some of you have finally started to self reflect, some of you regret how you hurt me, some of you regret all your past actions and how you kept hurting people, some of you want to restart your life from zero, some of you learnt to work on yourself when you saw me choosing myself over anything.
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It’s time to get serious in life, to find that #determination for yourself.
If you want to be successful in your career, you need to work hard to achieve your #goals. You need to work on your mental health, you need to heal your past wounds, you need to make amends with people in your life and have a work-life balance. Every great person was made out of these qualities.
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Heard it somewhere and I find it to be true.
Good friends are always there for you, they look after you, they fight the odds for you, the protect your, they tell you when you are wrong, they stand by you in every difficulty and they never give up on you.
You can go to them anytime and talk to them about anything & everything. At least this is what I do, coz I just love talking. One of my nicknames is chatterbox
All I have is my close family and some real friends and it makes me happy.
I love you guys @amu.pran @asfar1536 @chaudhary.kamakshi @ig_sara_h .
I don’t know if I will ever be able to write enough appreciation posts. Just know that I love you and I will always be there for you.
To you guys, I’m a healer, but my healers are my friends. It’s platonic love and I think platonic love is the best thing in this world.
Happy B’day Aman it’s been 10 years and we have seen a lot together and can’t wait to see more with you.
P.S. if you don’t know yet if someone is a true friend of yours, look out for these qualities.
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Let me introduce myself to those who are new here. I am a writer, painter, spiritual teacher, tarot reader, Psychic and intuitive life coach. I am a starseed and I help raise vibration on this planet. My life purpose is to help people, heal and inspire them by sharing my own story. Hit that follow button and be a part of this soul tribe.
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People have been judging me for a few weeks now and I learnt to not give a shit about it, AGAIN.
People who think defending yourself is bad, people who think being in your power is bad, people who think knowing your worth is bad. What you hate about others, says a lot about you.
When you hate someone for speaking their own truth, or maybe sometimes for showing you your truth, it shows how much you try to hide your own truth and to run away from it.
People who you think can become your friends, start falling out after sometime. You thought they could be your friend, but they can’t. That’s why I like to take few months before I get to see the real them, people manage to hide their real self in starting.
Also, people who think I am closed off because I am not open to new people. I am fulfilled with my connections, family and friendships at this time.
People get attached to Lightworkers, because they want to have a happy healthy caring person in their life, it’s like lightworkers attract people like moths to a flame, because people want to feed off of our energy. If I have space for only 4-5 friends in my life, but some 50 people want me in their life. And I start making room to take everyone in, where I don’t even need them, only they need me, that would be a great mess for everyone.
This is what all lightworkers need to know, people not only want to have you in their life, but they hold onto you for dear life, and that can be very suffocating for someone who practices unconditional love. Learn to say no when you just don’t want something, it’s not always necessary to give a reason.
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Boundaries should be there to protect us, but it should not be a wall. Boundaries are where you define what works and what doesn’t work for you in a relationship. But some people forget boundaries, and use walls.
Walls come from the fear of abandonment, rejection, childhood wounds or past hurt. They make you closed off with a block in the heart chakra. Your wounds don’t let you show the real you, vulnerable you to those you love. Yes, you can still love but you just won’t express it. Because you are emotionally closed off.
Some people, because of child abuse they learnt it very early in life, to never let their guard down, because they don’t feel safe. Wounds make you fear that, if someone saw the real you, they might leave you. But how would you know, until you try.
You need to find the right people, who respect your boundaries and be open with them.
I know someone could still have fears, but let me tell you something. I am an empath, I know how the smallest things can hurt us and that’s why we need to let people know what hurts us, otherwise, they will never know. But at the same time, I don’t keep myself closed off with people who I love and care for. Those who care back for me and allow a safe space for me to open up, know all parts of me.
So what you have is a wall or a boundary? Being a lightworker I am always reminded to first protect my own energy and then be giving to someone else. To protect yourself and to feel safe, you need people who make you feel accepted when you show your vulnerability. To protect yourself does not mean to always keep a mask on, so that nobody would ever hurt you.
People who have been through abuse need a lot of compassion from their loved ones. We need to make them feel safe. They deserve to hear it from us that “we don’t care what people did to them in the past, we just want to know the real them and love their real self”.
And when they open up, we need to have Empathy. Child abuse plays with your head, sometimes they would blame themselves for things that they weren’t even responsible for. We need to show them what love is.
Before you do anything externally, accept your loved ones for who they are, the real them.
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This is such a great feeling, it’s like an awakening, a realisation of becoming more of myself, who I am meant to be.
Repeat after me “it’s only me who has to be comfortable with my emotions, nobody else, it’s only me who has to accept all parts of myself, nobody else”.
I experienced this whole my life, some 30-50 abusive people told me like 100’s of times that I get defensive. I never learnt to own that part of myself. Because it was a bulk of people, so I thought they might be right. But they weren’t. It might be right for somebody else but not for me.
If someone’s attacking my value, my worth, I freaking want to defend myself. Why won’t I? Who is someone else to tell me about myself and then again tell me that I cannot even defend. I want to defend myself, I don’t want to wait for some prince charming to come and rescue me, I want to do it myself.
I had a toxic ex ghost me, ignore me, block me everywhere and tell me that it’s my fault coz I get angry. Like what we’re you expecting me to be. Women who are used to being limited, tried to make me adjust. Toxic bosses who want to ruin my reputation and say everything that is not true about me and want me to stay silent. Why?
Perhaps when someone’s lying, the biggest threat to them is someone who speaks up, takes a stand for themselves and tells the truth on their face. Other people would come and tell me I should not be defensive, mostly men. I guess they feel threatened if a woman knows how to use her masculine energy.
I really love this feeling of being me. It’s making me think why I didn’t do it earlier. I want to say to every toxic person, that if anyone would try to threaten my value, my worth, my people, my work or anything that I put my time and effort into, I would get defensive. Why won’t I want to be defensive? What’s wrong in it.
Damn, I love this part of me, I don’t mind defending myself, because I speak the most truth when I am defending.
It may be an imperfection to someone, but I love this imperfection. I am so going to own this part of me from now on.
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As you know I dealt with a lot of abuse and jealous people, I learnt to see through them with time. So I am going to share a tip here, people have different nature, but it works most of the time.
A jealous person often tries to make you insecure, so that after you feel insecure, your performance will decrease and finally he can be happy that he was able to get you down.
A lot of time they do it by sugarcoating. Now I have good self-worth, but some people don’t get that part. So they try to motivate you, ( to demoralise indirectly), it’s easy to identify a fake compliment if you know yourself. They will pick something that you do not feel bad about, and try to motivate you about that. And you will be wondering like did I really need motivation in this area or is the other person dumb. Nop, they are not dumb they know what they are doing, they are trying to input a new insecurity into you, which you actually didn’t have earlier.
They will be like don’t give up, 50 times in your face, when you are like yeah fine, get to the next point, please. Some people do these because they are push-overs, but most of the time it’s out of jealousy. After you start involving in the conversation and be like yes I think I do have this self-doubt, they will start trying to control you, now they will give you advice which ultimately has only one meaning, that you make limited moves, that you remain limited.
This is a good way of manipulation, a lot of Narcissists use it. This is how you fall in love with a Narcissist and think that they are a saviour in your life, but after few months or years, you start feeling as if you were always demeaned by this person.
I happen to have many funny incidents like this, where I say it to their face that I know how people try to demoralise by sugarcoating. My intuition just takes over me to ask these shitty people to leave. And you can see it on their faces.
They often make you do something and then later show that they are doing better. Because they did not follow the same suggestion, but you took the bait.
The solution is to cut off contact with them. Show them that you know who they are, you may want to act dumb with a Narc though.
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The Pretty Smart Techie 